A Gloucester man who has lost friends and family to suicide and other causes has spoken about the impact this had on his mental health. Knowing first hand what it is like to live with a mental health disorder, he is determined more than ever to raise awareness of the conditions and how they affect men.
Father-of-three and a self-employed plasterer, Shane Beard, 36, from Kingsway, was diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression in 2009. He says he feels his mental health struggles developed following a series of tragic events which happened to him from when he was 18-years-old.
As Shane understands how debilitating it can be to have depression and the impact losing someone to suicide has, he has set himself a goal on creating awareness of mental health battles with men. He set up a group called Shane’s Mental Health Fishing, as he has felt the benefits it has brought his mind when it feels chaotic, when he goes fishing.
Shane said: “I was diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression in 2009 and I have panic attacks as well. There are some days where it is extreme and I feel I can not face the world, and like my mental health and well being is crumbling around me.
“There is a lot going on in the family as I am a self-employed plasterer and two of our children are disabled. My eldest son is autistic and my other son has ADHD, is autistic and dyspraxia.
“My wife is my rock, and has always been there for me. It is a lot for her to have to contend with having the boys as well as me but we manage to pull through as a family.”
Shane says there have been several incidents which knocked his mental health. He believes this led to him having depression and suffering with extreme anxiety.
He said: “I think the mental health problems came from a mix of things of losing my Dad when I was 18-years-old and I found my friend dead in his living room. It was a very traumatic couple of years.
“I lost my brother in 2017 after a hit and run in Painswick Road. All of this had a massive impact on me.”
(Image: Shane Beard)
Shane has created the group called Shane’s mental Health Fishing to raise awareness of mental health struggles in men. He also fundraises and advertises them on the page in a bid to make money for the men’s mental health charity MIND, as the organisation helped him when he felt hopeless and he considered ending his life.
Shane said: “I lost my cousin in November as he felt he could not carry on anymore. More needs to be done to help men who are feeling like this and as much as we are not qualified professionals, people can get in touch with the Facebook page if they need someone to speak to.
“I had someone reach out to me over Christmas who needed support and i tried numbers suicide crisis charities who all seemed to closed until the beginning on January. There needs to be more done for men who are struggling.”
Shane says he finds calm from his mind’s chaos when he goes fishing. He takes his son with him too who seems to also find the benefit from fishing with Dad.
“My seven-year-old son is a fine young fisherman. I have been going fishing since I was around four-years-old and it seems to be able to calm the mind.
“I have seen there are studies which suggest fishing is good to ease the symptoms of depression. For me it’s like all the things going around in your mind fade away when you are fishing.
“All you are worried about is the angling and concentrating on the pole. It gives you relief from the symptoms of depression.
“I have organised fishing events which have raised £2,000 for the men’s mental health charity MIND. I decided to support this charity as they were there for me when I felt I could not carry on anymore.
“The charity sent me on well-being courses and gave me someone to talk to. They saved my life and I support them to do the same for others like they did me.
“There is not enough out there to help men with mental health struggles. I do hope this is going to change in the future. If anyone is struggling with their mental health and they need someone to speak to then my Facebook page is there, however we are not trained professionals.”
To sign up to Shane’s fishing events over the year and visit his Facebook page, please visit here.
There are many different places to get online help, including web-chats, text help, phone-calls and even apps with games to help you manage your feelings.
If you are needing help or just want to know what is available to you, we have compiled a full list of a number of services.
Below are just some of the helplines and websites that can help you.
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24/7 NHS mental health response line: For support and advice. Call free any time, day or night if you are worried about your own or someone else’s mental health. The team behind the 24/7 open access telephone response line will listen to you and determine how best to help. t: 0800 038 5300 (free) 24 hours a day
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Samaritans: Emotional support to anyone in emotional distress, struggling to cope, or at risk of suicide. t: 116 123 24 hours a day e: jo@samaritans.org
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Outlook South West offer online support and NHS talking therapies – call 01208 871905 for people aged 16+ years. The Suicide Liaison Service is also available via this number. This is also an NHS funded service, but for adults 18+ who have been bereaved by suicide.
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Childline: Free, private and confidential service for anyone under 19 where you can talk about anything. Whatever your worry, whenever you need help, anytime. t: 0800 1111 email or chat via www.childline.org.uk
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Shout: 24/7 text service, free on all major mobile networks, for anyone in crisis anytime, anywhere. It’s a place to go if you’re struggling to cope and you need immediate help. Text: 85258
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CALM Campaign Against Living Miserably: For men who are down or who need to talk, find information and support. t: 0800 58 58 58 5pm – midnight every day or webchat at www.thecalmzone.net
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Call 0300 777 4777 or visit https://saferfutures.org.uk/ if you or someone else is affected by domestic abuse, sexual violence and those demonstrating abusive behaviours.
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Papyrus Hopeline UK: For people under the age of 35 experiencing thoughts of suicide, or anyone concerned that a young person could be thinking about suicide. t: 0800 068 4141 e: pat@papyrus-uk.org